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Back in time
Twelve years ago, when I was 24, I met someone who I fell totally
head over heals in love with.
Dennis and I dated for 2 years.
I felt like he was my soul mate and we had a great relationship
for most of that time. Eventually though, family commitments and
a difference in lifestyles took its toll and we broke up. But I
never stopped loving him.
I often thought of Dennis and wondered what
it would be like to see him again. I knew though, that we were at
different places in our lives and I had much to do. So, I eventually
got over him, but I never forgot him!
Fast forward 12 years
later
I was living with a boyfriend but getting ready to move out within
the month. He was a good person, just not the one for me.
One afternoon, as I was walking out the door, my phone rang. The
voice on the other end asked for Alissa Cohen. This is Alissa, I
replied. Dennis Marciello, the voice on the other end said. I believe
my reply to that was a big, WHAT?. I couldn't believe it. 12 years
later and there he was on the other end of the phone line. I hadn't
spoken to him at all, in 12 years.
So as he began asking me how I was, where
I was, and what I was doing with my life, my brain was spinning!
Nervously, I began to babble on and on but eventually calmed down
enough to ask where he lived and what he was doing.
He owned a restaurant on the waterfront
and lived close to that, only 45 minutes from me! And he had been
thinking about me for years. (Always nice to hear) He tried to reach
me a few times over the years to no avail. Eventually he contacted
someone who knew me and they told him I had a web-site. He immediately
got my number off of the site and called me that day.
At the end of that conversation Dennis asked
if he could take me to lunch. (I began to explain what lunch for
me would be, but that didn't seem to deter him) I told him I was
really busy and he told me he was going to Italy over Christmas,
so I said I would call him after new years which was a few weeks
later.
Well, as I hung up the phone my mind was
on overload. All of the memories from t he past came rushing forward.
For the next few weeks as I tried to focus on my business, thoughts
of Dennis were distracting me to no end.
Finally, after the first of the year, I
decided to call him. January 3rd 2003 to be exact. I asked if he
still wanted to go to lunch, and if so, how about 2 days later on
Sunday. He said absolutely and we planned a date and a time.
As I hung up the phone I had the most startling
intuition. I knew that Dennis was going to ask me to marry him.
I had a picture in my mind of seeing him again and felt that within
an hour of our meeting he would be asking me to spend the rest of
my life with him. Now, part of my brain was telling me I was crazy,
but I just couldn't shake this feeling or that image.
I had no idea where Dennis was at in his life. I knew that he never
wanted to get married again, nor did I ever think I would. I just
never thought it a necessary thing to do. I thought I was crazy
for thinking all this and tried to let it go. I even started thinking
I wouldn't go, but I knew I had to, if only to establish that there
was nothing still there between us and so I could get on with my
day to day life and stop thinking about him!
Well, by the time Sunday came, 2 days later,
I was a nervous wreck!
I couldn't believe how I felt. I hadn't seen him in years. What
if he had changed? What if he hadn't changed? HA! What if he was
involved with someone and just wanted to take me to lunch! Ok, I
needed to forget all of the inane chatter inside my head about marriage
and getting back together with him. After all, I was working too
hard to get distracted now. I was on a mission with raw food and
healing the word to think about such minor things, right?
Well, the phone rang that morning. It was Dennis. Could I meet him
earlier, he asked. He couldn't wait. I knew I was in trouble. That's
what I kept thinking the whole way while I was driving to meet him.
It was all over. My life was about to change. No mistaking it. I
didn't know how this was going t o play out, but there was no doubt
after hearing his voice that day.
As I walked in to the place where we agreed to meet, I saw Dennis
standing, waiting for me. I was stunned that within minutes it felt
like we were never apart. After 5 minutes of conversation and small
talk, Dennis sat me down and said he had to tell me something. He
said he always felt that I was his soul mate and he felt like losing
me 12 years ago was the biggest mistake of his life. He said he
thought about me everyday for the last 2 years and finally had to
try to find me. Sitting there that night looking into his eyes,
it felt so different from anything I ever felt before. I knew that
I never stopped loving him.
As we spoke and got to know each other again, I talked on and on
about raw food and what I was doing with my life. Within an hour
he asked me to spend the rest of my life with him. I told him how
I was living my life and what I wanted from someone and he said
he was ready to change.
Call me crazy, but I believed him.
And I'm glad I did.
Two days later he asked me to marry him.
We were married Feb 1st 2003
After the wedding
Dennis has changed more (and more quickly) than anyone I have ever
seen. He has changed his entire life. He has become the person I
always knew he was.
I really wasn't sure if I would ever find
that perfect person for me. I was almost giving up hope about finding
that person with all the qualities I wanted in someone. The person
that I thought I would love and want to be with and someone who
was eating this way and living this lifestyle. I never in my wildest
dreams thought that Dennis and I would not only be back together
and married after all that time, but that he would become absorbed
in this way of life, traveling with me and learning, and sharing
this experience with me.
It's so amazing to be able to experience this way of living with
someone you love. Sharing food, preparing it, eating it, is such
an intimate act and one we do so often throughout the day. It's
so often been a lonely act for me when ever I have been in other
relationships. I've had to keep that part of myself separate.
It's not just the food preparation but the actual sharing of food.
Food for me is linked to love in so many ways. I love making food
for people; it's my way of loving them. And sharing a meal is a
way to connect with people you love. And serving healthy, healing
food is a gift for me that I feel honored to be able to give to
people.
Does that sound funny? That food could be such a big part of a relationship?
But its so much more then just the actual food. Eating healthy and
taking care of, and loving yourself is essential to being able to
care for and love other people. I'm reminded of a favorite quote
I had hanging on my refrigerator for many years: You have a responsibility
to yourself and others to make yourself happy!
There are so many things that partners experience, share and do
in a relationship, but for me, sharing a healthy lifestyle just
makes all of those other things happen so much more smoothly. When
you feel unhealthy, overweight, sick, depressed, moody, irritable,
etc, its makes it more difficult to feel and give love and have
fun with your partner.
It raises your quality of life to another level when you're operating
at optimal health.
It's so nice that I have someone who will
inspire me to be healthy and fit and happy and that it's not always
me having to try to inspire and motivate the person I'm with. Having
someone in my life that jumps out of bed at 4:30 in the morning
ready to work out, meditate and then make a smoothie is so refreshing
for me. (Although, yes, I have to admit, sometimes a bit annoying,
its true. 4:30! Every morning! I think I've created a monster!)
Now let's see if I can keep up. Ill keep you posted!
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